Wednesday, August 31, 2005


at last, a small picture of a supermalt can (not a stubbie, which would have been my container of choice). This is just a discarded can on the Old Kent Road. Adverts to follow hopefully.

There is no denying this is a sinister drink. Try it at your peril.

Rajesh Mirchandani (part 2)

You notice since my expose of Rajesh, there has been less news from the midlands...

Coincidence? I think not.

Saturn and Its Crazy Moons

First Mimas the Death Star, and now we find Enceladus is just a crazy, with half of it pock-marked and clearly old as old and the other half spurting out hot water, all in a moon apparently too small to have a hot centre. The boffins will be thinking that one over again, then...

Isn't it pretty though!

Close up of the Saturnian ski-resort:

Rather nice zoom-in movie here (of course the little alien skiers aren't visible to the naked eye...)

Would you credit it?

What is TV coming to?,14173,1559697,00.html


commuter commuter

blimey it has been a while.

and I have so far failed in my supermalt quest. sorry about that. If only I had a camera on my phone, I would have been able to bring you more news on the subject, but alas no.

The only reason I can give for my continued absence is the amount of time I spend travelling these days. The new job is all very well, but 4 hours is a bit much I must say. Even for the seasoned London commuter. But at least the mainline is actually air conditioned unlike the tube, God only knows how all those people survived today, with the supreme temperatures. 32 degrees they say. I do hope it is going to cool down a little for the weekend, I'm off to one of my bestest mate's weddings, and I only have rather unsuitable clothes. Wierdly enough, I have had a 4 weddings this year to attend, but there has been no overlap of friends, so I have been able to get away with the same outfit, but it is a bit hot, and every wedding has been on days of extreme heat.

Anyway the reason I am so verbose today is that I was sent home early. Can you imagine?!?! There was a power cut at the new company (haven't thought of a cunning name for it yet, but will do shortly) and they sent us home. Bit of a change from the old empire, eh! Other noticable differences include having to go through a right old rigmarole when I stuck a needle in my finger the other day. I probably did that a million times in the empire, but it is more frowned upon here! Mental note to take more care....

Things are going ok there, since you ask. Bit overwhelming, being expected to be all clever and knowledgable about chemistry, and unfortunately the old experiments haven't been going too well. I had to perform a quick switch when I first started too, as they put me in a job I didn't want to do, so I had to tell the boss which wasn't a great experience, but he was very nice about the whole thing and switched me over no questions asked.

Monday, August 08, 2005


Supermalt has been on my mind for some time now. This so called 'energy drink' is possibly the worst thing ever to have passed my lips. And I have chomped on some rank things in my time. I have no idea what it contains but the stench when you open the can or the stubbie is more than over-powering. Like a dead dog burping in your face. The taste is indescribable.

But it becomes more sinister. This is not a racialist rant, but the fact of the matter is that I have never seen a white person drinking it (except when I am my friends decided to try it, but that was only because it was free and we soon regretted it). A quick canvas of Asian friends has ruled them out too. In fact, the only people that seem to enjoy this drink are black. Is it something that we are missing?

Even stranger, there are NO PICTURES of this drink on the internet. Well not as far as google knows anyway. There is an advert in the Elephant that I will endeavour to photograph when I am next there (of course it contains only black people).

What is the supermalt conspiracy?

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Rajesh Mirchandani

I signed out of the empire today hoorah, but it did mean I had to give back the puter (boo hiss). So I am typing this on the old desktop trying to get used to it, and realising that I need to remember all my passwords that I just had Mozilla remember for itself before.

Anyway, that is not the point. The point is, Rajesh Mirchandani. Here he is:

Time was, we knew him only as a radio 1 presenter for his show called backstage or something, or for the Holiday program and that sort of semi-celebrity stuff. Now all of a sudden, he is everywhere. He has become the BBC's 'midlands' corresspondant. Now, is it just me, or has the midlands just become a news hotspot. I am starting to wonder if he is a criminal mastermind leading and gathering smaller-time rogues to prowl the streets of the midlands and get his face on TV.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the evidence:

1) unusual flurry of activity regarding bombings, raids, terror suspects, bomb scares, evacuations, etc. etc. etc. all taking place in the midlands

2) freak weather. a tornado hits Birmingham.....? Per-lease! I realise I am suggesting here that he has some sort of huge weather machine, and is using it with a callous disregard for property and life, but let us not forget his quest for fame.

3) and most worryingly. Rajesh is always on the scene in a tailored suit, smart shirt, freshly gelled hair, and always always looks pleased with himself.

I rest my case your honour.